The “My Testimony is Worthless” Syndrome

My testimony is worthless syndrome

I’m sure you have heard it before, and if you are anything like me, you probably felt it before as well. My testimony is worthless, do I even have a testimony? What’s the point of sharing anything about my life when no one is going to be able to relate to it? I don’t come from anything crazy, I don’t have anything special. 

You see, I am one of those. I grew up in the church. I was the child who went up to be saved every time there was an altar call. And I mean, every time. Honestly, I was too young to know what an altar call was. If someone said, do you want Jesus in your heart, my answer was always yes. I only realize now, that my constant going up to receive Jesus was a strong indication that I wanted more of Him in my life. But when I was a young tween and I started to realize what I was doing, I was incredibly embarrassed. I distinctly remember the last time I went up for an altar call.

We were visiting friends who had recently moved away and we went with them to their new church. I was in the class with the friend near my age and the youth pastor dude phrased it in a way that I didn’t know what he meant, so I raised my hand. He made a big deal about it as if I had never accepted Jesus before, which is what he was really asking, and knelt in front of me in the front row and prayed with me to accept Jesus into my heart. I remember that so vividly because one, I already had Jesus in my heart, and two it was an incredibly embarrassing situation for a 10 year old girl who just thought she was raising her hand in answer to a question that was something along the lines of “do you want more of Jesus?” Here I was, in the front row of a strange church, with a strange class, with people who I had no idea who they were accepting Jesus for probably the thirtieth time. Did they think I didn’t know Jesus now? I’m sure there were a lot of factors to my embarrassment , but it was compounded by the fact that the young youth pastor dude then proceeded to proudly tell my parents when they picked me up that he had led me to the Lord. I laugh now just thinking what they must have thought. “Okay. . . she’s already saved, but whatever. “

See, I don’t have a distinct, light and dark moment where Jesus came into my heart, cleansed me of all my sins and I was suddenly a Christian with this whole new outlook on life. It wasn’t dramatic, and to be honest, I just feel that I’ve always been a Christian. I don’t have a memory of that one defining moment.

I didn’t struggle with drugs until God saved me. I wasn’t an outcast until God saved me. I wasn’t desperate for love until God saved me. I just was, and always have been a goody two shoes of a girl who loves Jesus and seeks to continue to know Him better.

And that’s okay. Just because you don’t have this dramatic testimony, doesn’t mean that God can’t use you. I have had seemingly (to the outside world) insignificant struggles over the years that God has strengthened me through, grown me through and overall taught me to have a greater trust and reliance on Him through. And God has used those. I know He has and I know He does.

My testimony is not worthless. And neither is yours. No matter what it is, whether you were saved at age two or age 32, knowing, and holding dear your testimony is an important thing.

My people, hear my teaching;
    listen to the words of my mouth.
 I will open my mouth with a parable;
    I will utter hidden things, things from of old—
 things we have heard and known,
    things our ancestors have told us.
 We will not hide them from their descendants;
    we will tell the next generation
the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord,
    his power, and the wonders he has done.
 He decreed statutes for Jacob
    and established the law in Israel,
which he commanded our ancestors
    to teach their children,
so the next generation would know them,
    even the children yet to be born,
    and they in turn would tell their children.
 Then they would put their trust in God
    and would not forget his deeds
    but would keep his commands. ~ Psalm 78:1-7

Maybe that’s why I like stories and being a writer so much. They tell the goodness of the Lord to the next generation.

What’s your testimony? How has God used it in yours or another’s life?

By God’s Grace,

Victoria

 

4 thoughts on “The “My Testimony is Worthless” Syndrome

  1. AMEN TO THIS!!! *big hug* Just YES. Every person has a different story. God says in the Bible we all have a part — no testimony is greater than the other. It’s our calling to share the Gospel, and God knows exactly who we (with OUR testimony, no one else’s) can reach. ♥

    Liked by 2 people

  2. AGHHH this was so good, Victoria! I know exactly what you mean – I was brought up in the church and accepted Jesus at a young age. So like you, I feel like I’ve always been saved, and I was always taught the truth. Thanks for writing this very needed post, Victoria!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Excellent post on a needed topic. “Worthless” is a strong word – for me personally, I’ve more felt that I had little or nothing to say. But a testimony is simply that which we testify, and what we testify (bear witness of) is what we’ve seen/experienced (witnessed) – which should be Jesus Christ and every moment of His great work in us. It’s not so much about a specific moment of salvation since our physical birth as it is about THE moment on the cross when He said, “It is finished.” It’s not so much about recounting a life-altering change (though certainly for many people that’s how God works) as it is about how Jesus lives through us every day and how we testify of Him through that.

    What’s more, this entire blog post is a powerful testimony of God. “Wanting more of Jesus” is an excellent way to put that desire you had – I think it’s common to many children growing up in Christian homes. I asked Jesus to come into my life several times throughout childhood, not because I thought it didn’t work but because I figured it couldn’t hurt – I wanted to make sure Jesus lived in me at that moment. “More of Jesus” is a great description, and it’s a wonderful desire for anyone to have – it’s an indication that we are indeed abiding in Him. 🙂

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  4. This post was so relatable! I am amongst those who grew up in the church. I said the prayer of salvation when I was 5 but I believed and wanted more of Jesus long before then and while I was joyful to have Him in my heart, there wasn’t that dark to light moment for me, either. I also had a similar embarrassing moment of confusion in Sunday school when I was a little older that made the teacher and other students think I wasn’t a believer (much to their literally dumbfounded shock), and yes, the teacher reacted much like that youth paster and then told my equally confused parents about the wonderful thing that had happened. I think one of the other students, bless her good-intentioned heart, even made me a bit of a project after that. .-.

    Because of my lack of a dark to light moment, I have sometimes worried that my testimony isn’t enough to reach anyone, or at the very least that those who have lived harder lives would think I haven’t been through enough for my testimony to have any meaning to them. But you’re right. We can’t let worry keep us silent. God is more than capable of using our testimonies for His will. The only thing we need to worry about is looking for the doors He opens for us to share our stories and allowing Him to work through us.

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